Oct 28, 2010

Let's All Be Crybabies

Hi readers! Please welcome the next guest blogger in my series of wanting to hear more from you. Meet Stephany, a fabulous college student from the Sunshine State who's here today discussing something I think is a bigger issue than we sometimes realize.

I don’t cry much. Every once in a while, I’ll become emotional and have my bouts with crying, but for the most part, these eyes of mine stay dry. I guess you could surmise I am a little out of touch with my emotions, and it’s true, I am. I firmly believe it all stems from my father and the effect he had on me, good and bad. He was a tough guy and taught me to be tough.

But every once in a while, I realize it’s OK to let down my guard and let my eyes fill with tears. Doing so does not make me a weak person, a baby, or too much of a girl. It means I’m human and real.

One of my biggest fears is crying in public. And like many of my fears, this comes from bad experiences doing so when I was younger. I don’t want people to see me as weak and the very last thing I want to do is totally demolish the walls I have placed in front of me by crying and showing emotions.

But it has happened. Twice at work in the last two months. And twice I have realized the power of the human spirit. You see, I work at a preschool. It’s a fun job and gets me away from the humdrum that is my school and personal life. I work with women and we have our moments of niceties and squabbles. I have worked there for close to two years and have been through a lot with my coworkers: death of a student in our program, miscarriages, infertility, death of a coworker’s husband, family problems, health problems, teachers leaving... none of us have it easy.

And yet when things like this happen, we rally around one another. We show support and love. And I have experienced this firsthand from two of my crying fits. One happening about a month after my mom was hit by a car and I was dealing with a lot. I was frustrated and minute things kept happening that tore away at my spirit until I snapped. And cried. I found out then what a gift I have in my coworkers. How concerned they were for my well-being and how they were willing to do anything to help me.

It happened again this past Friday when another coworker snapped at me. As much as I’m not a crier, I am still a very sensitive soul. The littlest things will bruise my heart and sadden me. I tried to hold it together, but ended up crying. Luckily, I was by myself but I had to go into another classroom soon after where the teachers could tell I had been crying. Yet again, I experienced support and love. The teachers rallied around me, hugged me, and talked with me. (It helps that the particular teacher who snapped at me isn’t well-liked around our center.)

I’m on a journey of learning that it’s OK to cry. It’s not a sign of weakness, it doesn’t mean I’m being a baby. And through this, it has shown me that I have a network of support in my coworkers. Maybe not in all of them, but there is a specific group of people who know me and who want to make me happy. If it wasn’t for my walls tumbling down and tears filling my eyes, I would have never have discovered this. It makes me wonder what else I could discover if I only just opened my heart more.

Tell me, do you cry easily? Or are you more like me, where crying isn’t something that comes easily or naturally to you?

Thanks for this great post Stephany - readers, what do you think?


Diana Mieczan said...

That is a great post! Sometimes we all need a big cry and its totally ok to do so. Wish you both a great day

Ps: hope you had a chance to enter my ban.do Giveaway!

Lisa from Lisa's Yarns said...

I would say I am a crier. I cry pretty easily, especially during certain times of the month when hormones are off in my body.

I have gottne over the fear/discomfort of crying around others. I used to think it was a sign of weakness, but now I think it takes a strong person to show their emotions by crying in front of another person. If someone cries in front of me, I do not think less of them, I think - 'what can I do to help this person?'

Crying at work is the worst, though! I have also done that a few times. I am usually able to hide it but this summer I wasn't so a male co-worker said, "Let's go for a walk" so we could get away form the cubicle farm. Which was just what i needed. I got my cry out and returned to work feeling much better.

Amber said...

I am a HUGE CRY BABY! I cry really easily, especially when I'm stressed or extra emotional. I don't really cry at work and if I do I go into the bathroom so no one sees me :(

Nora said...

Um. I'm emotional. So I cry. Once a week? Maybe more. It depends on the day/week/reason/situation for crying. It can be a problem sometimes. =)

Kyria @ Travel Spot said...

I never used to cry but now I realize I cry when I am mad. I dont know how to communicate so...I cry.

Becky, I love these guest blogs; they always give me new bloggers to try out!

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