I had a whole post in my head about inspiration and how I've been not only loving the yoga classes I've been taking but I feel like I'm becoming more hippie crunchy and how I'm embracing it. I even had a muffin the other day called hippie crunch muffin. (No I am not kidding, and yes it was delicious).
However, I thought before posting a peace, love, hope, post I should tell you about two nights ago...in the spirit of keeping it real.
Ben and I are at the halfway mark in our sugar detox and in a lot of ways it's been fabulous. I get hungrier now but I also stay full longer because I'm not packing my body full of high fructose corn syrup and empty calories - I'm choosing things that are better.
But the other night? Sh*t got real.
I had a rough day a couple days ago. It all boils down to miscommunication on a grand scale, but the day ended with me in tears, curled up in bed with my kindle, not wanting to talk to anyone. (Bless Ben and his ability to realize that - he simply made dinner and left me alone. He's a keeper that one).
Normally after a day like that I'd have a glass a wine with dinner or while I was reading, but I didn't because of the sugar factor. Frustrating, but not the end of the world. Until I moved from my bed to the couch (still reading), and my thoughts shifted from wine to cookies.
Chocolate chip cookies to be exact.
The kind of delicious chocolate chip cookies that I know the store closest to my house sells. I was almost drooling just thinking about them.
The good news was we didn't have anything sugar-y in our kitchen. The bad news was we didn't have anything sugar-y in our kitchen. I had some crackers and the whole time I was thinking horrible thoughts about them, even while I noticed they were filling me up more than the cookies would have. I looked through our whole pantry and deemed it all unacceptable. I hated everything one minute and needed it all the next.
I forced myself to just keep reading.
Later I was able to recognize the awesome mood swing for what it was - a craving. The first really bad craving I'd had so far. I'm pretty lucky to have gotten to this point without one and I know I'll have more, but that first one? It was a doozy.
I didn't cave. I didn't eat anything sweet, and I didn't go out and buy cookies (although I was very very close at one point).
What amazed me was how I was able to distinguish between knowing this wasn't a "I want to eat my feelings" kind of mood, I wanted the sugar. Needed the sugar. Had to have the sugar. But I also knew in the back of my head that this was the first bad craving and if I could get through this, the others would be easier. (If that's not the case please don't burst my bubble).
Will there be more cravings? I'm sure. Will the moods swings be as bad? Man, I hope not. But I'm seeing what sugar does to my body, and that's motivation not to give in. I want to be in control of my body and my moods and not be at the mercy of sugar.
Four weeks down, four to go.
Have you ever had a really bad craving that affected your mood? How did you handle it?
Happy hump day!