In the spirit of the season

Dear Cece,

I've been thinking of you a lot lately.

A year ago today we were told your heart rate was not where it should be, and there was a good possibility at some point it would stop beating completely.

The doctor was wearing a Santa hat. The nurse handed me tissues when I started to cry.

It's almost surreal now; there was a time I couldn't imagine thinking of you without sadness, yet now you always bring a smile to my face.

The excitement we have for your brother does not diminish the loss of you. 

I firmly believe you had a hand in us being blessed with him, and I promise he will know you.

There are a lot of people hurting during the holidays - I know it's a lot to ask, but if you could bring some peace to them, or a moment of hope, I know they would appreciate it. I'm determined to do that myself this season - we'll work as a team, you and me.

Merry Christmas, sweet girl. Thank you for being in our lives - we were forever changed by your presence.

All my love,
Mom