Apr 27, 2016
A letter to my son on his first birthday
I cannot believe you are one! A year ago I was in labor, and at one point I tearfully said to your Dad, "he's never coming out!" We had waited and waited and waited, and were just so excited to meet you!
I still remember hearing you cry for the first time. I gasped, and tears filled my eyes as your Dad and I looked at each other in awe. Once they had checked you out, the nurse brought you to me. Your eyes were closed. I whispered, "Hi Parker," and even with eyes still shut, you turned your head toward me. The tears were stronger then as I kissed you over and over, and the nurse cried, "he knows who you are!" My first proud Mama moment.
This year was all about firsts - for you and me.
You've taught me how to go big.
Big with my love, big with my forgiveness. Big with my protectiveness, and my humbleness. I didn't know I had this capacity for love this big, but you showed me how.
We prayed for you. We wished for you. We hoped for you. We waited almost five years for you.
And yet you are so much more breathtaking than I could have ever dreamed.
This has been the best and hardest year of my life. I can't promise we have it all figured it out, but I promise we'll keep trying.
I will always love you.
I will always show up for you.
Thank you being the sweetest, most hilarious, amazing little man!
Happy Birthday sweet baby - I love you so.
All my love,